Month: April 2020

I need to attend to various pressing issues in my life, so I will not have the time to post to this blog (or my two other blogs) for a week or two. Thanks very much for reading, and I will look forward to posting again soon.

I walked in a wooded area near my home today for the first time in quite a while.

It’s late fall. It’s past the point at which a person can walk in the woods and be amazed by the majestic beauty of the changing leaves. Now, most of the leaves are fallen and dead, the trees are becoming bare, and the air has a slight chill. It’s at the time of the clear indicators that winter is coming.

In past years walking in late fall has left me with a kind of sadness – a regret that I hadn’t gone walking as much as I’d hoped and/or an unsettling nervousness about uncomfortable weather on the way.

I wasn’t overwhelmed by those feelings today – instead I felt unusually calm. That seems to be because of my stage in life right now. I’m not young, but I’m not extremely old either. I have many good things in my life to be grateful for. I probably have many more years ahead, but even if not, I’ve had some very good ones up to this point.

There are some difficult circumstances occurring in my life right now. I intend to face them courageously, peacefully, and with the knowledge that better times are coming sooner or later.

Today wasn’t a good day for me.

I had to go offsite for a work project to a location where relationships between many of the customers and co-workers are strained. I wasn’t sure of where I stood with a number of people, and didn’t feel as if I was at fault for that being the case. After a long day there, nothing occurred to relieve me of any degree of my angst.

During the day, I heard a co-worker that I’d never met ask another individual if he lived near a town not too far from my home. He didn’t, and then I interrupted and said I did. I though it was just going to involve a request for a ride, but it turned out to be a complex effort involving picking up and delivering manuals. I volunteered to do it.

Later, I began to ask myself if I did so motivated by psychologically unhealthy people pleasing, or out of nervousness, or from a desire to initiate a work-related ‘power play.’ But then I decided not to talk myself into believing any of those things. I concluded that I did what I did because I believe in the golden rule. It’s just how I roll.

The gesture will probably involve considerable inconvenience and some expense to me. I’m not sure that it will be taken in the spirit in which I intended it, and that doesn’t matter. It’s not a big deal, but I’m going to take a little personal and professional pride in what I did just the same.

One of my favorite books is Arthur Hailey’s “Hotel,” written in 1965. Hailey was well known for novels in which he gave detailed overviews of various industries in the process of spinning plots and sub-plots focused on memorable characters. Back in that day, I believe he was considered to be ahead of his time.

Today I felt overwhelmed thinking about the number of things I have to do pertaining to personal and professional goals, and how much older I am than most men who are engaged in similar endeavors.

Then the character Mr. Wells from “Hotel” came to mind. For the balance of the book, Mr. Wells appeared to be a simple, quiet, 87-year-old man of limited means just relaxing while staying in the “St. Gregory” New Orleans hotel. Then, toward the end of the book, Wells was revealed to be the hotel’s remarkably wealthy and shrewd new owner. In the process of telling that to the hotel’s general manager, he mentioned that he owned newspapers, shipyards, and restaurant chains. “I like new things,” Wells said, “it keeps me interested.”

I may not have Well’s money, to put it mildly, but I’m grateful to still be much younger than he was. I want to be like him when I grow up – liking new things, and going about them with vigor and a childlike sense of wonder throughout the remainder of my years.

 I saw a Facebook post from an old friend’s wife today. It said, “Quit looking in the rear view mirror and get on with your future.”

I didn’t think of her as someone who would have many past regrets, because her and her husband are pretty successful people. But maybe she was counseling a friend rather than referring to herself in the post.

I do have a tendency to dwell on past mistakes too much. But I liked the woman’s “rear view mirror” analogy. Sometimes unpleasant memories of past mistakes can help you avoid present ones. You can even build positive memories out of the instances in which you avoided past mistakes moving forward.

The rear view mirror is a useful tool, but looking in too much constitutes using it for something it wasn’t intended for. Her point was well taken.

I’ve got about fifteen minutes before I need to drive off to work. There are six or so things I could be doing right now, but I’ve settled on writing two quick posts on the blogs I’m running concurrently.

I’m thinking of the television commercial about products for middle-aged men in which the announcer states “You’re at the age where you know how to get things done.” I probably won’t need their product for a long time, but I think the sentiment is true about me. I used to dabble in numerous things every morning before work and not really complete most of them. But these days I have a better process of setting priorities. I’m planning to feel good during the commute about having written the two posts.

On to my other blog.

A few hours ago I drove past the former site of a restaurant where I used to eat fairly often and remembered being in there with a friend one night. He pointed to the cook, a rough looking character, and said, “He looks like “Junior” in Dick Tracy.”

Later on while I was paying the check I struck up a conversation with the cook. He turned out to be an easygoing man with a very pleasant disposition and who had been a cook for 20 years. “I love to see people eat,” he said.

I thought about the man’s great outlook. Then I had to ask myself about my own attitudes about work, relationships, and life in general, all of which have deteriorated lately.

I’m supposed to do my work we because I should love to see customers get good products.

I’m supposed to take my wife out on dates often because I should love to see her enjoy  getting R&R.

I’m supposed to nurture relationships because I should love to see the benefits that my friends and relatives get from them.

I’m supposed to go through life because I should love to see what God does in the world and understand it better.

I’m supposed to do those things just for those reasons, but a lot times I don’t.

The restaurant went under about 15 years ago. I really hope their cook fared better than the restaurant did over the long run. He deserved to.

Moments ago I heard the 60’s hit “Walk Don’t Run.” It made me contemplate my current circumstances.

I’m under some work-related pressure to acquire rudimentary web development skills. So about a week ago I began an online course in XHTML coding. A few days into it I asked myself what I could do for free without coding from scratch.

I hemmed and hawed about it for days, telling myself that if I started a web page then I should start it out right. But the tune brings to mind the cliché, “You’ve got to learn to walk before you can run.” So I’m starting this blog right now without content.

I pledge to no one in particular that I’ll post at least four times a week between now and the end of October. Hopefully between then and now I’ll learn enough coding to be a little dangerous and subsequently build this blog up with some bells and whistles.

That’s the plan of the moment, subject to change without notice.